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I'm a LESBIAN girl who WANTS to marry a GAY man..>>yes!

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shocking title? wait to see the content
well Im Egyptian and here in Egypt it's so hard being a lesbian not just that its sooooo hard to be free..

because I'm an Egyptian girl living in this fucked up community, I can't work or go out...i just cant fulfill my dreams........ and honestly I'm FED up!

so i came up with this idea...to marry a gay friend of mine so i can win my freedom and for him to look straight in front of this fucked up community

but see? I had to marry a man to be free...i hate to get married so i can work....this is what the screwed up community did to us :) this community is soooo fucked up its like they feed off our lies! its like they want to be lied to!!!

p.s if thing didn't work out between "x" the guy i want to marry i'll find another one and another one so I can get out of this house!!!!

* please please excuse my random style of typing >>>I just open this blank sheet and start babbling without re-reading it*

Peace and love
xx .

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    Hello Ranah,

    I, as well as most of Ahwaa audience, understand your frustration. It's hard for either a male or a female to detach from their family house, and even harder for females.

    I detached 6 months ago, and living with my partner, but I really struggled to get back/normalize the relation with my family, as they were totally against moving out.

    I told them openly that I could depend on myself financially and otherwise. Gradually, the relations have returned back to normal, and I just visit them a day or a couple of days weekly.

    In your case, I totally support you in your decision, as the only way out. The 2nd option is to travel abroad to study/work. As long as you're here, do it! It's your right, and you should just get it, even if you'll get around the community taboos. We don't need to battle in the Don Quixote-style forever. Get around, live your life to the max, and most importantly enjoy it!

    I'll let you know if I come across a match to your case, as I do live in Cairo as well.

    Peace!

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      your allowed to live with your partner I Egypt ...you are out , its totally permissible where I live but because of the stigma and taboo aspect in my religion and culture I stay closeted... and I live in the west your a brave man .....

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  • 25-34_f_w_h1_f4
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    Hey Ranah;

    Funny enough, I was discussing the same idea with my gf the other day ! We will never be able to live together here in Egypt, the only solution is for me to marry a gay guy, or to travel " Which is not that easy ! =/"

    But isn't there anyway for you to convince your family about work? I mean, having a life and being financially independent will be the first step to either travel or to get a place on your own. I believe you should start there.

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      It is not that easy Artemis, I am sure you aware how difficult fir girls to live independent in Egypt, especially if they are two girls ...this is unfortunate....But, I am supporting the part to get marry from a gay guy as long as you gonna live in Egypt.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h4_f1
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    Hi Ranah ,

    hope you are in good health .about your question ,the only way for you to do what you want is to GET out of Egypt . And i think the idea of marrying a gay dude just so everyone around you consider your into straight marriage is a bad idea,i mean its a good idea to think but this is not what you truly want right~?!

    so like @Amadeus & @Artemis said (which i totally agree with them) try to go with the work idea ,that you want to have more experience in life and it will mean a lot to your career.

    Living in Egypt and most of the Arabian countries is like hell ,you can't do anything you totally want ,or be yourself without being judged by close ,stereotypical stupid ppl who only stick with their old tradition and in the end you may get punished if you did so :(

    so if you can't make your parents get the idea of moving away from them ,have patience .go take courses ,study more ,learn different things to gain experience and try to be more dependently so when you try to convince your parents the next time .you will have evidence with you that you are capable of living alone ^__^ (most standard egyptian ppl needs something to backup your words with =proves that you can do it)

    • 17-24_f_w_h3_f3
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    • 25-34_m_b_h3_f1
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      hey Ranah, I live in USA, suffering from the same problem, gay here, has my own house, but the whole family live closer to me, pushing me so hard to get married, email me at nhannausa@gmail.com. may be we can help each other out.lol

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    • Hi i am interested in getting married let's take this further. I have the same issue.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    i'm single in case you care XD XD

    well , just hope you don't say someday " damn , i want to have a a baby " .. it is possible , right ?!

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  • Default-avatar
    Advice

    I don't think a lavender wedding is the solution of all your problems .. But I think you should attack your family with ideas of you working in case you haven't given up on that .. work, work and gaining money will allow you out of your family's territory .. Like Artemis said traveling will do you wonders.

    Love and Peace.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    Why don't you just travel abroad n get married to a check!

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  • don't do that, even tho you will get married..a year and two and your family will start thinking..why doesn't they have kids yet..why isn't she pregnant and people will start to gossip.. and also you will spend the night with your "real partner" right?! it will be weird to do that in the presence of your so called husband lol, and even when his "boyfriend" comes and spend the night..people will be like he lets strangers spend the night and his wife is at home?!..how about a surprise visit from your or his family ...you never know what's gonna happen..just don't take the risk.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    I'm sorry I duno if this is an old post or so but I'm gona act like the taken movie guy.. if you ever do that, and ruin your life, I'm gona find you, and I'm gona hunt you down, then I'm gona hurt u, then I'm gonna kill you. :> you just cant surrender to ur fears, are u serious? marrying someone just to feel alive? ezay? I know it seems like the only thing possible bas no, this blows

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f3
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    I dont know how to reply to a topic like this, what I'm going to say is I'm very sorry we're still going through this when it's the 21st century, that no one has done anything about it yet. Soon guys, soon. I hope I'm as crazy and stupid as I think I am. :p

    Ranah this is sadly a good idea, you can help each other out of the country then apply for refugee, is that your plan?

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    ^mesh mesada2ak.

    since it's a good idea, fine.. let's get together Ranah, i'm 3 years younger bas age is just a number, lol

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f3
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    She's not gonna ruin her life if she does it, why do you say that? They could have a deal that as soon as they leave the country they will break the marriage, I dont think either party will feel bad about it and they can both go their separate ways. It's better than getting forced to marry a straight guy she doesnt like and living a shi**y life, dont you think?

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    I never said she'd ruin her life, Im just not really supportive of the idea, sorry? o.o im just not really into the idea but Im not judging lol, sorry if it came across weird, anyway.. goodluck Ranah. :)

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f3
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    Why are you sorry? dont be, I understand where your coming from but unfortunately we have to take different measures to live a normal life. Good luck to ranah is right.

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    yea I'm just done having people misunderstand me okay?^^ - yea people are different, newais I said what I have, baii.

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  • i wish you all the luck because i think is a good idea in order to leave your family house and live your life :)

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  • 17-24_f_f_h3_f3
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    Please if you do find one toss him around we can share right ? haha :D they can marry 1,2,3,4 cant they lmao

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f1
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    good idea but it is so difficult as you think i

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  • 17-24_m_b_h3_f3
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    Jeez i have been totally detached, If this looks like a short term possibility do so. Just try and get your career. Contact the USA guys if you can :D

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  • 25-34_f_w_h3_f2
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    marriage with benefits wow am sure you will find a guy who will be willing to do this I guess for the same reasons your dong it

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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f3
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    i have the same exact problem with Ranah and i'm sure with most girls, being an iraqi muslim and a lesbian is so hard and our solution is to get married to a gay guy who has the same problem as us girls to be free and not take bullshit from the family, i hate to say it but i too am looking for a gay guy to mary, someone who's open about it and who's willing to risk it!! guys write to me if ur interested and girls HEELO THERE BEAUTIES :)

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  • 17-24_f_w_h1_f3
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    i meant i have the exact same problem AS* Ranah

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    hi ...we r lesbian couple...muslims and we r 18-24 .. we r looking for tow gays to get married to..fake marriage we can be best friends and ofc no sexual contact... plz if anyone out there is interested contact us...we really need this as soon as possible...
    emil : gayforlesbian@hotmail.com
    skype: towlesbians

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  • 17-24_m_w_h3_f3
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    انا فكرت فى الموضوع دا قبل كدا

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  • 17-24_m_b_h3_f3
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    I am impulsive by nature and I am needy. Sounds pathetic. I want to change but I cannot change. I want to complain about my discomfort because I want acceptance but at the same time I cannot be fully sure of my own sexuality. I am not willing to call myself bisexual because it does not help me accept myself. I feel different towards guys and girls.I wish to really know how it happened but I am afraid to be patient o know how it happened. I really wanted to change myself but after all the scientific theory I became aware of how prejudice people can be. Lately i started thinking of marriage because that oddly makes me feel better...I am n admitted it talways judgmental about myself because I think I am not that good, I am always worried of my sexual orientation and I cannot be proud internally. I do not wish to be in this porblem because it is just so hard to deal with ...I know I am a coward in this case. This is my weak point because when people tell me that I am sick I feel motivated to do (which I dnt even know whether I will be good at it or not) I will do it but only Alah(swt) knows the result. I am always confused.....ALWAYS confused....ALWAYS confused and I am afraid to meet the things some of you are not....I think low ofmyself when I see a proud gay men so confident in what he likes....I feel sad if I come out my family...and trust me SO MANY PEOPLE LOVES ME here that it makes me feel that I can never come out and even of i do with there motivation I may marry and ebd up being freaked out more. I dont know why but many gays report that some of them enf up liking sex with girls and I am like WHAT THE SHIT? Will I also end up liking it....I just dnt know which path to follow because I am just not confident and proud. I guess this is part of life..I wish to accept but then I just think if I am happy then Allah will not be happy...if I am sad then Allah will be happy but thats just unfair becuase I will be comparing to th the straight person beside me....I am trying..I am struggling and I have no one to listen to me..to be patient with me...this stone in my chest...people turning their back....thinking less of me added to the fact the I think less of myself..added to my confusion and low self esteem....that I cannot be so certain.....
    I have learned and changed...but i cannot change this part because everytime I try its just hurtful....I cannot keep it a secret but if I speak out loud I cannot be confident about it like I used to be before I even admitted to myself....I need help. I need someone who would help me..to be a better person...to be brave....because i certainly dnt know which to judge and keep myself away from..what is right for me and what I should do...i realized things soo early and so immaturely that i am unable to deal with thing properly....not even my own family understand...And why should theygo through the trouble? After all almost all scholars believe its a sin and all m life i belived it to be sin and now suddenly I am hearing its not a sin or it shouldnt be.......odds are in my favor and oddly i cannot accept it....I guess in the end I want to say i didnt want to be gay but no matter how many times I imagine things with girls me liking guys never change..I am always reminded of it...I am always scared and angry....i want to bring up this explanation so many times...i want to end my bad feelings..but I cant. People tell me I am nice but am I really? I guess not....I dnt what to do.I wish to marry just be have some attention from a girl bcs she would listen and help me psychologically....I am so troubled even though I dont appear to be.

    • Default-avatar
      Anonymous
      Advice

      being gay is not about likening sex more with a man or women its about feelings this is true gay thats why they are proud because they have feelings towards a special someone and do not fear or care about what the world has to say because there love for that persons makes them over come the fear of anyone

      i think you should sit down with your self and think hard about who you have more feelings towards and leave your dick out of it coz liking to hv sex with a gay does not make you gay or bi in my opinion its feelings that count more than anything else

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    Anonymous
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    Idunno if it is an old topic or not but am searching for a gay guy too anyone outside?

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  • 25-34_f_w_h2_f3
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    I sympathize with you sweetie. I hope an idea like that could work out. Why not? You two make a deal to appear as husband and wife in front of society, but have your own gay relationshipson the side.its called an open marriage. Maybe you can have your partners move in or stay over sometimes and have a good time hanging out . If you can move far away from family, then your girlfriend or partner can potentially live with you,. Anyways, you can work something out . Its not impossible. Have faith!

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  • 25-34_m_b_h3_f1
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    you all can can contact me christian gay guy here, nhannausa@gmail.com

    Reply to Nader
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  • i wanna marry a gay guy too alexandria-egypt

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  • 25-34_m_b_h3_f1
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    hey email me nhannausa@gmail.com

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  • 25-34_m_w_h3_f4
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    it worth to try, being friends first , and then see how things going , plz contact if you are lesbian in Cairo and interested to the idea
    i am 32 y here and seem every body now is conerned to may merrage

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  • 12-16_m_f_h1_f1
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    Just far away from this marriage topic more problems with making friendships with girls,I want to have friends who are the same like you guys ,I go out and so with my straight friends but I feel awkward hope someone get what it feels like so contact me

    Reply to Karim98
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  • I find it stupid because you wanna let go and hide in the shadows you want to live a happy life with a women ot a man you love go fucking do it who stooped you think that the world will change for you nah it wont of you hide no cgange comes from nowhere in order for you to have the life you want you need to work for it not get married off its a stupid idea

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  • 25-34_f_w_h1_f4
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    Although this is an interesting discussion, one has to bear in mind, people get into a relationship with different goals in mind. For some, family is a big deal, or having a family of their own... Or being with the love of your life. It depends what you prioritise. It is however unacceptable to judge others for not wanting to come out and trying to live on the 'sidelines' as it were. Some.. Do 'come out' and it's easy for them. The struggle is bad enough and then to be judged by the LGBT community is really sad.

    My point is.. If you wanna marry a gay friend and have your bit on the side then great. Your family still looks after you and cares for you everything. Bear in mind, family is only one unit of society- and society is judgemental and no one wants to put their family through that really unless they know their family can cope. It becomes a selfish choice to ignore your family and their standing in society. It's a bit like going to have sushi when you know everyone with you wants and can only palate Arab food.

    Hmmmmm... Interesting notion all the same. Topic was really entertaining to read hehe.

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  • 17-24_m_b_h3_f3
    Comment

    WTF i'm shacked Girl !! =D
    i was thinking about the same thing those days
    marry a lesbian girl for me is a win-win situation to get ourselves free from our FUCKED UP community
    marry me =D =D

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  • 25-34_m_f_h4_f4
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    Hi guys..I am inactive jehovah witness and want to marry a girl that understand me also...someone out the please.... I am from south Africa... Like the lady who first committed..........

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  • 25-34_f_f_h1_f2
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    Hi all, As an Egyptian queer i totally understand wat u r talking about , i really don't know what's better to be ourselves in secret or have courage and be in danger in our homophobic community. But i 've found a Lebanese comic series trying to discuss the same situation may it help better thinking with some fun http://iluvubut.tv/

    Reply to Horya
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  • 17-24_m_b_h3_f2
    Comment

    Hey there im a Gay man from Austria/Vienna willing to visit your coubtry if you ready to get married i can bring u to my place if u give me the chance to get to know you better im 22 years old and looking for a Lesbian Woman

    Reply to doan
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